Frank Pierre Presents: Pierre Resort & Casino | Infomercials | Adult Swim


>>WELCOME TO THE FRANK PIERRE RESORT & CASINO. THE PIERRE IS EaSleePlay. “HOTEL TOUR.”>>HI, I’M FRANK PIERRE, AND I’D LIKE TO TAKE A COUPLE OF MINUTES TO INTRODUCE YOU TO MY LATEST VENTURE. I BELIEVE THAT CLASS ISN’T A CLASS YOU CAN TAKE. THAT’S WHY I BUILT A SCHOOL TO TEACH IT TO YOU. AND THIS IS IT — THE PIERRE RESORT & CASINO. I MADE MY MILLIONS GIVING PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANTED, WHICH WERE PICTURES THAT WHEN YOU STARE AT THEM LONG ENOUGH, YOU SEE OTHER PICTURES. I CALLED IT “SEEN IT, SAW IT” ART. WHY DON’T YOU SEE FOR YOURSELF? [ GUNSHOT ] [ WOMAN SCREAMS ] DID YOU SEE IT? I CALL THIS ONE “WHALE OF A PRESIDENT.” [ CHUCKLES ] THE PIERRE RESORT & CASINO IS THE FIRST RESORT CASINO OPERATED ON INDIAN LAND THAT IS NOT OWNED BY A NATIVE AMERICAN, AND THAT’S SOMETHING I’M PROUD OF. AND I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE THINKING — “BUILT ON SACRED NATIVE AMERICAN LAND. THAT MUST MEAN GHOSTS.” [ CHUCKLES ] NO WAY. WE’RE 100% NOT HAUNTED BY GHOSTS. [ LIGHTNING CRASHES ] [ EVIL LAUGHTER ] THAT’S A GUARANTEE THAT ALL MY RESORTS, CASINOS, RESTAURANTS, AND CHAINS OF VIRTUAL-REALITY BOWLING ALLEYS ALL HAVE IN COMMON. NOW, LET ME SHOW YOU AROUND. THE POOL AT THE PIERRE IS QUITE SPECTACULAR. IT’S THE ONLY POOL IN THE WORLD THAT HAS 13 REAL DOLPHINS ALL THE TIME. WHY WAIT TO SWIM WITH THEM WHEN YOU CAN DO IT 24/7? PLUS, OUR POOL ALSO FEATURES NOT ONE BUT THREE SWIM-UP COCKTAIL BARS, WHICH MEANS NOT ONLY CAN YOU SWIM WITH THE DOLPHINS, YOU CAN DRINK WITH THEM, TOO. AND REMEMBER OUR RULES — NO SHIRT, NO SHOES, NO PROBLEM. [ CHUCKLES ] WE ALSO HAVE SOME OF THE BEST RESTAURANTS IN NORTH AMERICA RIGHT ON THE PREMISES. IF YOU’RE AN AMERICAN LIKE ME, YOU LIKE HAMBURGERS. WE HAVE THE WORLD’S LARGEST HAMBURGER GRILLERY, AND IT’S CALLED — YOU GUESSED IT — FRANK’S. TRY OUR BREAKFAST BURGER… OUR LUNCH BURGER… OUR DINNER BURGER. HOWEVER, IF YOU DON’T EAT FOOD, WE ALSO HAVE BEAUTIFUL ROOMS WITH ORNATELY DECORATED TABLES AND ABSOLUTELY NO FOOD. IT’S A FIRST OF ITS KIND. SO EAT OR DON’T. WE DON’T CARE. NO GETAWAY WOULD BE COMPLETE WITHOUT A RELAXING TRIP TO OUR SPA FOR A ONE-OF-A-KIND SUNDAE TREATMENT, AND THAT’S NOT “SUNDAY” WITH A “Y.” IT’S “SUNDAE” WITH AN A-E, LIKE THE DESSERT. OUR TRAINED MASSEUSES CAN MAKE YOU INTO A HUMAN SUNDAE USING AN EXFOLIATING WHIPPED CREAM… A CLEANSING CHOCOLATE SAUCE… AND FROZEN ICE-CREAM MASSAGE. YOU’LL BE SO RELAXED… YOU’LL WANT TO EAT YOURSELF. MM. OUR GYM HOSTS OVER TWO MILES OF TREADMILLS, SO THERE’S ALWAYS ONE AVAILABLE. OR YOU CAN TAKE AN ACTUAL RUN FROM ONE END OF THE TREADMILLS TO THE OTHER FOR A SURPRISINGLY REFRESHING WORKOUT. OUR GOLF COURSE HAS 23 HOLES, WHICH IS FIVE MORE HOLES THAN A NORMAL GOLF COURSE — BECAUSE WE CAN AFFORD IT. AND BECAUSE WE LOVE TO SUPPORT NATIVE AMERICAN HERITAGE AT PIERRE’S, WE HAVE THEM ON STAFF 24/7. JUST PRESS THE “INDIAN” BUTTON ON YOUR PHONE. EVER WANT TO EXPERIENCE A TRADITIONAL FIRE DANCE… OR TAKE A PICTURE WITH A REAL-LIFE NATIVE AMERICAN INDIAN? [ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKING ]>>”HIT MOVIES.”>>WOW. LOOK AT THAT. IT LOOKS YOU’RE RIGHT THERE IN FRONT OF ME. [ CHUCKLES ] THAT’S A JOKE. THAT’S NOT HOW TELEVISION WORKS. BUT IF I COULD SEE YOU, I’D IMAGINE YOU’D BE SITTING IN YOUR ROOM THINKING, “THERE’S NOTHING ON TV.” [ Feminine voice ] OH, DON’T BE SILLY. EVERY ROOM IN THE PIERRE IS EQUIPPED WITH M-O-V-I-E-T-V, WHICH IS OUR ACRONYM FOR MOVIE TV.>>GET OUT!>>[ Normal voice ] WHAT’S THAT, SUSAN? [ Feminine voice ] WELL, FRANK, IT’S A VIDEO-ON-DEMAND SYSTEM THAT DELIVERS THE LATEST MOVIES FROM THE CINEMA TO YOUR HOTEL TV. [ Normal voice ] WE HAVE A SELECTION OF THREE ROMANTIC COMEDIES, FIVE BRO-MANTIC COMEDIES, AND TWO MOVIES THAT ARE GENUINELY NOT GOOD. BUT THAT’S NOT ALL. YOU LIKE TO BINGE WATCH? GET THE “BEST FRIENDS” PACKAGE AND CATCH UP ON EVERY EPISODE OF THE THAI REMAKE OF THE AMERICAN HIT SHOW “FRIENDS”… FOR ONLY $99.99. BUT HURRY UP. YOU ONLY HAVE 24 HOURS TO WATCH ALL 236 EPISODES. OR IF YOU’RE LIKE ME, YOU LIKE VIDEO GAMES. [ CHUCKLES ] BAM! I GOT THE BAD GUY! [ CHUCKLES ] SO FOR ALL YOU VIDEO-GAME ENTHUSIASTS OUT THERE DIAGNOSED WITH PAC-MAN FEVER, FEED YOUR ADDICTION WITH UNLIMITED SUPER ULTRA BRICK BUSTER XTREME FOR $14.99 AN HOUR. DON’T GET P-OWNED, NUDIE, ON THE VIRTUAL GRIDIRON. I’LL FRAG YOU ALL DAY.>>”ADULT MOVIES.”>>DO YOU LIKE TO WATCH PEOPLE… DO IT? [ CHUCKLING ]>>PERVERT! YOUR PRESENCE UPSETS THE GODS. IF YOU CONTINUE TO DISREGARD OUR PLEA…YOU WILL PAY.>>BUT KEEP THAT BETWEEN YOU AND ME. [ DING ]>>”TEENS DAY.” SATURDAY IS TEENS DAY. WE KNOW IT’S SO HARD TO FIND SOMEONE OR SOMETHING THAT YOUR TEEN ACTUALLY LIKES. THE FRANK PIERRE RESORT & CASINO OFFERS A STATE-OF-THE-ART INTERNET CHAT PROGRAM THAT CONNECTS YOUR TEEN TO OTHER TEENS IN THE HOTEL.>>I LOVE MAKING NEW FRIENDS.>>”CASINO.”>>LOVE CASINOS BUT FIND THE GAMES COMPLEX? WE’RE THE FIRST CASINO TO HAVE MILLIONAIRE SOLITAIRE… CASINO WAR… PROFESSIONAL POGS. FINALLY, GAMBLE WITHOUT ALL OF THE PRESSURE OF STRATEGY.>>”LEARN CASINO WAR.”>>HEY, THERE, LUCKY. WHY DON’T YOU TEACH MY FRIENDS HOW TO PLAY THIS WONDERFUL GAME?>>LEARN CASINO WAR. IT’S THE THINKING MAN’S GAME FOR THOSE PEOPLE WHO, THEY DON’T LIKE TO THINK. CASINO WAR IS PLAYED USING A STANDARD 52-CARD DECK. THE DECK IS DIVIDED BETWEEN TWO PLAYERS. EACH PLAYER DRAWS A CARD AND PUTS IT INTO THEIR RESPECTIVE PILE. THE PLAYER WITH THE HIGHER-VALUE CARD WINS BOTH CARDS! YOU KEEP DRAWING CARDS UNTIL ONE PLAYER HAS ALL THE CARDS AND — JACKPOT — YOU WIN!>>WELL, THIS SOUNDS FUN AND UNCOMPLICATED. I LIKE IT! HOW LONG IS AN AVERAGE GAME?>>ABOUT 30 TO 40 MINUTES A HAND.>>WELL, THAT SOUNDS TERRIFIC. [ MAN SCREAMING ] LET’S PLAY.>>ALL RIGHT. WE EACH DRAW A CARD. LOOKS LIKE YOU WIN. YOU GET THE CARDS. LET’S DRAW ANOTHER. WELL, MY CARD’S HIGHER, SO I WIN. LET’S DRAW ANOTHER CARD. HO HO HO! LOOKS LIKE I WIN. LET’S DRAW ANOTHER. YES! I WIN! LET’S DRAW ANOTHER. WOW! WE BOTH HAVE THE SAME CARD. THAT MEANS WE BOTH GET TO SAY…>>Together: CASINO WAR!>>SO WHEN THAT HAPPENS, WE EACH PUT A CARD FACEDOWN AND DRAW WHAT I LIKE TO CALL A “WAR CARD.”>>DID I WIN?>>NO, I’M AFRAID NOT. I WIN, SO I GET ALL THE CARDS.>>I GUESS THAT’S WHY THEY CALL YOU LUCKY.>>YEAH.>>DEAL ME IN… AND I’LL SEE YOU…AROUND. OH! [ EXHALES SHARPLY ] [ GASPS ] [ BREATHING RAGGEDLY ] WE’RE ALL DEAD. WE’RE ALL DEAD. WE’RE ALL DEAD. WE’RE ALL DEAD. WE’RE ALL DEAD. WE’RE ALL DEAD.>>[ SPEAKING NATIVE LANGUAGE ] [ DRUM BEATING ]>>I HOPE YOU ENJOYED YOUR STAY AT THE FRANK PIERRE RESORT & CASINO. PLEASE STAY AGAIN.>>WELCOME TO THE TOWN OF SACRED HOPE. THIS IS WHERE THEY ATE. THIS IS WHERE THEY PLAYED. THIS IS WHERE THEY LIVED. THIS IS WHERE THEY TEASED HIM. THIS IS WHERE THEY BEAT HIM. THIS IS WHERE HE HID UNTIL HE BECAME…ONE OF THEM. “SKUNK BOY.” NOW ON VHS AND LaserDisc.>>YEAH!

100 Replies to “Frank Pierre Presents: Pierre Resort & Casino | Infomercials | Adult Swim”

  1. Luke Hepburn says:

    Dead deer flashing up at 2:18

  2. jamesaellis says:

    Coop messing with the timeline again!

  3. Dillon Jordan says:

    Can you cut that 3 days down to 1 cause I have school tomorrow and I kinda don't want to go

  4. Dersu DeLarge says:

    Ray Wise is awesome.

  5. Alex Schilling says:

    Casino War: Dealer pulled 10 of diamonds back to back to back 🙂

  6. mamuburaa says:

    AHHHHH Leland Palmer is back and he's brought Bob and the gang!

  7. Stizzk says:

    I hope it’s real

  8. Victor Fernandez says:

    Oh boy i cant wait to watch this on acid 😀

  9. Chris Voss says:

    this baby dick made me laugh my pussy off

  10. Chris Voss says:

    good morning pussy fart

  11. Nolan Peet says:

    Love me some professional pogs

  12. The Pope says:

    What's that Susan

  13. Yoo Toob says:

    why did he suddenly go super saiyan?? 3:24

  14. Matt Kimball says:

    2:18 -> Deer Carcas

  15. James McCray says:

    It's been 3 days, I want my refund

  16. Brian Nolan says:

    who else is alive 3 months later??

  17. Oscar Leon says:

    Well fuck

  18. Tr. Da. says:

    2:18 DAFUQ? Was that a dead carcass deer? Lol XD

  19. Kibbles says:

    The native american part reminded me of the catholic school kids incident… lmao

  20. Renee N. says:

    "More Holes"

  21. captindo says:

    That pick at 2:17 caught me off guard.

  22. Tn says:

    But do little lambs eat Ivy?

  23. Gambit2483 says:

    Why?

  24. LeonCo RobloxianGamez says:

    at 2:16 (slow down to .25) you can see exactly what those juicy meals were made of

  25. Joseph Waters says:

    Fun fact: Ray Wise was ALSO in an Adam Ruins Everything episode titled “Adam Ruins Television.” I gotta say, between “Frank Pierre’s Hotel, Resort & Casino” and his cameo performance in “Adam Ruins Television,” he did pretty fucking good! Knew how to scare the shit outta me at the end as well!

  26. Ask Alotofquestions says:

    ?

  27. nomen Cognomen says:

    2:18 Elon musk squirt

  28. Daiyz says:

    That shit with the native american is disturbingly close to how it is in Hawaii

  29. CrystaJoy says:

    Oh, Leland…you know how to make the twin peaks hard with that adult video section…

  30. Darkobert Dub says:

    the whole time i tried to click the "Menu". DOESN'T WORK !!!!

  31. Big Time Murph Media says:

    At 8:09 and the subsequent draw the cards are the same. Nifty stuff. Just another passing detail to add to the unease.

  32. spencer kleiman says:

    6:22 omg the prettiest girl i have ever seen. Beautiful <3

  33. Petit says:

    02:17 A dead deer wtf. Why did I even pause the video 😩

  34. Petit says:

    Paul Scherer wrote this lol
    I guess he's a big The Shining fan

  35. zoperxplex says:

    Fools! It was not the Occipital Bone where Kennedy's injury was located at but, rather, the Parietal Bone along the right lateral cortex.

  36. asymptoticbehaviour says:

    @2m18s https://i.imgur.com/d0cl0Zs.jpg

    What the fuck, frank!

  37. 族 Bryan Lee says:

    So this is the hotel The Eagles were talking about.

  38. C H A V Y C H I V A S says:

    2:17 very appetizing I see

  39. Zee says:

    I've seen this video numerous times and its absolutely fantastic, the attention to detail is amazing. Never noticed the guy in the background at 3:43 before, goes to show all the effort put into this

  40. Paulina Stone says:

    If I'm not dead in three moons, I'm suing for false advertising

  41. PRTKL XLR8R says:

    "I believe class isn't a class you can take. That's why I built a school to teach it to you."

    Starting out strong with this one!

  42. DRAKE129 says:

    2:17 you might have to press . and , to see it if you are on computer

  43. m says:

    Am I the only one who finds him disturbingly charming.. like to the point he looks like the actual devil? xDI miss reaper. ):

  44. Luise Atoll says:

    You'll always be my president, Ray Wise. Always will.

  45. Mouse Poon says:

    "I love making new friends" oh…ooooohhh

  46. ZA_Survivalist says:

    2:17 roadkill splice?

  47. QuietGrave says:

    you will NEVER convince me ray wise isnt actually real satan

  48. Devin Anderson says:

    That one frame image of a dead deer…"some of the best restaurants right on the premises,"

  49. Hiiiindenburg says:

    2:17 wtf why is there a dead deer

  50. TheVisigoth says:

    Adult swim always has to have random unfunny violence for some reason lol. Not like Broomshakala violence which was funny, but just a random creepout bloodspray. Tis odd.

  51. Shervy2k says:

    Lol his suit is so poorly made

  52. LaGuerre19 says:

    2:18 delicious carcass alert

  53. Dr Mantis Tobogan says:

    Sweet I'm watching this on a Thursday so I guess I'll be dead on Monday. Suits me

  54. Jordan Stallard says:

    Anyone catch the mutilated deer carcass around 2:18

  55. TheBestLettuce says:

    thank you for the infomercial frank pierre polnareff

  56. OKRLU says:

    yeah ok but this Thai remake of friends..

    tell me more

  57. Donkeytron64 says:

    The Ghostwood project is finally happening!

  58. Dirty Mike says:

    Dir. by David Lynch

  59. HailOdin666 says:

    I saw Lincoln

  60. devekut2 says:

    weak.

  61. khasona Tam says:

    3:44 there’s a fuckiing hanging man behind them

  62. khasona Tam says:

    “I like making new friends”

  63. Krishna Kumar says:

    This is how Fyre festival ad should be

  64. Irishman Rants says:

    The Horne Brothers have nothing on Frank Pierre!

  65. Zsolt Váradi says:

    skunk boy, im fucking dead 😀

  66. JH Boob says:

    Why do most of these adult swim videos start out funny then wind up creepy/sinister?

  67. james pond says:

    That man is the devil!!

  68. Magick Johnson says:

    expected BOB to pop in, was not disappointed

  69. Bongwater33 says:

    Was that caitlyn jenner cohosting?

  70. Hilt Tilt says:

    If I die in 3 Moons I'm sueing

  71. Vend Erre says:

    Bruh, that fuckin deer gore pic. Wtf. First JFK getting his head shot off, then deer gore?

    Wtf is going on in this video? Who made this shit?

  72. jonny favors says:

    Twin peaks Laura's dad!!

  73. Christopher MacIntyre says:

    I prefer "Lonny's Desk" to "Skunk Boy", myself. It's so much more bromantic. They do make a nice double feature, though.

  74. Dondat625 says:

    Gotta love that sneaky dead deer

  75. Wittyfish says:

    I'm dead in 3 months.

  76. john bongornio says:

    So this is the white lodge

  77. Lebannehn Karnimirie says:

    Кто посмотрел тот здохнет

  78. IV says:

    2:18 why the fuck is there just a split second of a dead goat what the fuckkkk

  79. Wild Zero says:

    Adult Swim–Twin Peaks crossover. Cool.

  80. Adam Beaton says:

    Given where it looks to be located in the Southwest, I feel this resort is just outside of Night Vale.

  81. BigDad72 says:

    I’ve been watching this video for 5 years and I just noticed the hanging body on the golf course

  82. LSB says:

    You may have killed me, but I will use the term Indian until I die. And I will wear a hat of an insensitively named sports team. And I will misunderstand how dream catchers work. Screw you!!!

  83. Dante Mussolini says:

    He's also from fresh off the boat and was on young and the restless for a bit

  84. Old Pops says:

    2:17 ~ 2:18 oh god

  85. ThatOtherKid says:

    8:08 they play the same cards lmfao

  86. Yellowblanka says:

    "Don't get P'owned nudie…on the virtual gridiron…I'll frag you all day!"

  87. Crimzon Star says:

    "how long is an average game?"
    "about 30 to 40 minutes a hand!"
    "well that sounds terrific!"
    screaming of the damned
    "lets play!"

  88. andre vautour says:

    100% not haunted by ghosts

  89. Daniel Miyahara says:

    Ok, but why the dead deer at 2:18?

  90. Massimiliano Gallieri says:

    Bologna burger nooo

  91. Emanuel Sebastian Călin says:

    Did you guys die?

  92. Travis says:

    Better not let Mr. Jackpots near that Casino War

  93. YouOpaOpa says:

    Nice to see Leland working again.

  94. Jabby Napigkit says:

    It kinda fascinates but at the same time bothers me that this was published on my birthday

  95. Coffeebeard says:

    Man I've been looking for a copy of Skunk Boy for at least sixteen years.

  96. Marcelo Andreguetti says:

    so, Leland Palmer bought the resort from the Horne's and changed his name?

  97. titlewave says:

    YOU KILLED LAURA!!!!

  98. Jihad jakkson says:

    Ray Wise is undefeated.

  99. Shannon Randolph says:

    This man has changed my life

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *